Are you more interested or interesting?

June 3, 2021

If there’s one challenge that seems to befuddle the I Parrot, it’s balancing being interested with being interesting.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that I’s aren’t interested in you, it’s just that they put more energy into sharing stories about themselves. Thus, they prioritize being interesting over being interested.

While some people may find this to be a bit off-putting, it’s important to understand the source of this behavior. I’s connect to others through stories. So, when you share a story about say, a recent hiking trip, I’s seek to connect to you. They search their internal database and voila! A story about hiking. As soon as your story comes to an end, here’s comes the I’s hiking story…or quite possibly, several stories about hiking. Others may interpret this one-upmanship, but for the I, it’s just about connection.

Couple this with the fact that I’s seem to have a near endless supply of stories that don’t need prompting, as they can easily hop from one topic to another without you saying anything. In fact, they can seemingly carry on an entire conversation all by themselves…a conversation that can span a wide range of topics without even coming up for air.

I was recently coaching an I who had gotten some feedback that she monopolizes the conversation. I suggested that she try being a little more interested and a little less interesting. Her response, “But I can’t help it that I’m so interesting.”

And there you have it.

Merrick Rosenberg